1955 - January-March

     Nora Barnes in 1955

Saturday, Jan 1st
   Generally Mary and I spend this weekend in London but this new year she came to Droitwich on the afternoon train and we had tea at the usual café. Then I took her to the Ayrshire Hotel. The manageress had not told me the number of her room, which caused some delay as she was not to be found. It turned out to be a long way from mine on the half-landing on the front stairs, next I think my neighbour in the dining room, now revealed as Col. James, a Redditch needle king. It was a larger room than mine with a bigger single bed. We had a nice dinner and then went out to see Aunt Clara at the cinema. We were back soon after 10.30.
   A highly respectable hotel with excessively thin walls presents a lot of problems to lovers who are far apart and not even on the same level! It was decided I should come to Mary - she suggested in dressing gown, but I thought in full suit, tie and socks over aertex shirt worn at night and nothing else. It was well for I met a maid when leaving my room, but entered Mary's I hope unobserved. She was in bed and we were soon together, very warm and very happy, only breaking the silence by our whispers. By one o'clock the passage lights had long been out and the needle king was snoring next door, so I made the return journey by the beam of a small electric torch, telling Mary of the notice in a Portuguese hotel: "Guests are kindly requested to return to their rooms before morning."

Sunday, Jan 2nd
   Soon after ten we started for the big swim. I got in first which was perhaps as well, for some low man tired of waiting for the attendant with the hot towel and having removed his trunks walked back to the steps at the shallow end stark naked! Well I never did! There were two boys in the baths whose splashing was a menace and hot eyed Harry who leered lecherously at all and sundry.
   After lunch we let our meal digest a little and then passed the afternoon comme les francais. At four the old lady next door had her tea brought in and we heard her turning over the pages of her newspaper and setting down her teacup. Anyway the bed did not creak, or we hoped not. Mary went of on the 6.17 for Reading. It was such a happy weekend.

Tuesday, Jan 4th
   The first snow of the winter. Went the short trip to see the doctor through the snow in the morning.

Wednesday, Jan 5th
   Massage in the morning. In the afternoon braved the cold and slush to Worcester. Went to the china junk heap and got three coffee cups for Mary (next she must learn to make coffee!).
   The government now trying to get the Transport Commission and N.U.R. to reopen negotiations as Inquiry Committee has on whole supported railwaymen and said it is no good the commission going on repeating that they must pay their way. The community in willing the end - nationalization - must also have willed the means - an adequately paid staff.

Thursday, Jan 6th
   The masseuse told me the old woman who had the room next to me was rich widow of 80 plus with no relatives and the vicar was, the locals believed, visiting her assiduously in the hope that the church might benefit!
   Tonight was turning over a volume of Neville Cardus. Only the material, the rare stuff for imagination's manufacture, is given to us, whether by Bach or by the Matterhorn or by César Franck or by the stillness of snow on Christmas Day, or by Dickens or by Harry Dean. We must ourselves fashion it into spirit and sensibility and weave it into the texture of our being. Whether the shape or symbol be sonnet or sunset, curve of fiddle bow or curve of cricket bat, only with our own vision may we see the light and be free to say:
   I was for that time lifted above Earth,
   And possest joys not promised at my birth.

Friday, Jan 7th
   Left Droitwich at 11.30 and travelled back with a coffin carefully packed in hessian and addressed to Paddington! Met Mary for tea at the G.W.R. Had told Nora to meet me at 4.30, but with the bad luck that seems to dog our relations she had sent Hilary by bus and herself had arrived early so everything went wrong. Hilary was cold and fed up with waiting and Nora thought I had missed the train and was running round exhausted. She hardly spoke the rest of the evening. A cheerful home coming!

Monday, Jan 10th
   The first day of term. Two students sent from Reading and seemed promising, one history and one French. Spent day answering letters and dealing with minor problems such as the violin man and his heat, or lack of it, in the practice room.
   The M/G says a major war is improbable before 1960, though if it did come the first 30 hours would probably be decisive for Britain. America has a long lead in air power and we are believed to be holding our hand in guided missiles so that by 1960 we have the best. We are spending £160m on research and the balance will swing in the end to which ever side finds the antidotes to the other's discoveries. In the long run research will count, in the short run bomber strength.

Tuesday, Jan 11th
   Good news! Hilary through G.C.E. biology, history and German. Next hurdles Latin and college entrance. Hilary and Nora went to tea with Phyllis and the Barnecot brood. Mrs B has such a reputation for sluttishness I suggested Hilary should take a fly spray! Wilk has moved into the biology lab though of course all the cupboard doors have already warped in the heat and I am sure there will be many other snags - and complaints.
   
Thursday, Jan 13th
   Headlines in Daily Mirror and cheap press because a talk by a Humanist lecturer, Mrs Knight, on how to bring up your child without religion - this at 10 on the London Region and the second talk; they appear to want the third talk banned and a church council has said it is "shocked and horrified..... that the B.B.C. should violate all the laws of decency and Christian conduct by broadcasting pagan views to the parents and children of Britain." If they continue these broadcasts they would contribute to the complete downfall of our whole Christian civilization.
   The Canon seems to have given it up as a bad job and has gone off in a fur hat and a Balliol tie to the south of Italy for three weeks, so the curate tells me. The latter has been appointed to the living of Toot & Marsh Baldon and I shall be sorry when he goes as one might have far worse.
   Abut 3.30 snow started falling and by teatime it was three or four inches deep.

Friday, Jan 14th
   By this morning the snow was quite deep and one bus had difficulty getting up Peppard hill. The beech avenue looked very beautiful in the midday sun. Went over to Mary by bus. Went to see The Living Desert, a Disney film of animal life in the California desert. Excellent colour and photography. I tried coming back by train as there was 15° of frost and the buses were so cold. The train was standing in the bay beautifully warm and steaming, but, alas, it left 20 minutes late at 10.40 and after changing the engine round at Twyford did not reach Henley until 11.15. I struggled up through the intense cold and had quite enough by the time I reached the playground. When I went to make myself a hot drink I found all the saucepans had been left dirty.

Saturday, Jan 15th
   A white world. The milk arrived in chains and the post on foot!
   Hilary announced to my surprise that he does not want to be a schoolmaster and did know that he did not want to read either history or English at Oxford! He thought P.P.E. at Oxford or sociology at Cambridge would be more useful. I pointed out that it was much more important to get a college to admit him. He could settle his school with the college later.

Wednesday, Jan 19th
   Took car over to Mary. To tea in a Tea Cottage at Theale - good cakes and brown toast but now costs 5/-. The flat heat was off and it was really very cold in there. The temperature never rose above 50°; After suppper we went to see Three Coins in a Fountain; enjoyed it very much. Just before they showed the Mont Blanc massif in colour and Mary was very thrilled. I said,  "Mountains for you, Rome and Venice for me."

Thursday, Jan 20th
   Read the modern translation of St Mark through in three periods, actually less. Yesterday began my triennial reading of the Pilgrim's Progress. Both I thought most impressive.
   After nearly four years a letter from Arthur Lane. He sounded very low. After a physical breakdown in his legs, in 1952, varicose veins - last year his psyche gave out and he has been in the hands of the "trick cyclists". It was free under the National Health Service, but even so very unpleasant.
   "Perhaps even the birds no longer lay with the old carefree abandon and the ladder lies rotting in the copse. Nettlebed lads have no doubt lost their libido and the maids pine untowsled in the lanes. Ahead lies only Harwell - I do hope Hilary will be spared that and will be able to take up some healthy non-cerebral job like forestry or pig breeding. [Diarist's note: They kept him going for eight years, then he committed suicide]

Friday, Jan 21st
   Took car over to Mary. Still no heat in flat and very cold inside. She suggested having intercourse in our clothes, but it was too hurried and not very satisfactory - still what can we do!

Saturday, Jan 22nd
   Shopped for Nora in afternoon and horrified to find Ridgeway Darjeeling tea now 9s 8d a pound. Took Wilk to coffee. Ioan has finished his war book and sent it to a publisher.

Sunday, Jan 23rd
   Find out Rice-Oxley is now subwarden [at Keble], which seems a good thing from our point of view, so get Hilary cranked up to write a letter of application. Rather alarmed to find he addresses his letter to "Mr Rice-Oxley"' Doesn't bother; however Nora says he is feeling inferior and a disadvantage of going to Keble will be that he is overshadowed by "my brilliant career."

Monday, Jan 24th
   Wrote to Mary for haystack anniversary yesterday and today received a post card of a Boucher Nude on a sofa. The weather, unlike 1940, was dull, still, damp and muggy.
   [Card from Mary read: My darling Hubert. This is to bring you my love and tell you that I remember so well January 24th 1940. Such a cold cold day but I was not cold in spirit. I was inspired and warmed and had my hand in your pocket for the first time. We were warm together with snow on the ground - a happy beginning. Your Mary.]
   Reading Spears' second volume of Assignment to Catastrophe - The Fall of France, June 1940. Really when you study this you hardly wonder some of the Americans were prepared to write off the the Third Republic as a liability and look to Germany or even Spain or anywhere rather than the Assembly and its coalitions.
   On French women: Just practical, I thought, not expecting too much of life, but allocating to each of its carefully segregated aspects its due share of wholehearted attention. Food is important in life, so they concentrated on that with excellent results; in the matter of love, when more important material interests did not intervene, they were more ardent, gay and light hearted than our girls.  
   On telephonists: The American wife of a minister of Posts and Telegraphs, who, infuriated by endless delays and wrong numbers, snapped out at last, "I shall report you, I am the Minister's wife." "Don't get so excited, ma petite," came back the answer, "it so happens that I am his mistress."

Thursday, Jan 27th
   Took Eric Attrill over to an English conference at the Institute of Education [Oxford]. I then went to collect the [Grammar School] Charter from the Bodleian and took it to be framed at Rymans; next to the offices to see about cleaners' wages and caretaker's overtime. This took much too long and only reached the I of E in time to hear the end of a brilliant lecture by Neville Coghill on Shakespeare. I was a mutt to have missed this for the caretaker!
   On the way home Eric took her hair down about Norman. The poor chap had gone before a selection  committee for ordinands and been turned down - yet in Henley the C. of E. is represented a) by Canon Crosse, who is batty, and b) Rev Clark who is cheap, vulgar and lewd. Told Eric I was anti clerical and so could not be much help as a referee, but if I could, I would!

Saturday, Jan 29th
   Reading hard all day at C.V.Wedgewoodr's new book, The King's Peace. Must keep ahead of Hazel!

Wednesday, Feb 2nd
   A vast concourse of parents, getting on for a hundred. Clem and Mary C. doing tea, so had to impress two boys, Colyer and Lait, to show round, which they did very well. There was the new biology lab, an excellent exhibition of art, music by the orchestra, and the usual tour of the gym, woodwork, library etc.
    Reading Tom Jones' letters - secretary to four P.M.s, much about Baldwin. Mrs B to Conservative meeting: "I appeal to each of you to be responsible for one expectant mother."  The Keeper of the Public Lavatories in Westminster received an unexpected legacy and took a holiday inspecting the lavatories in Liverpool!
   A good deal about Edward VIII and “The Lady”. He said before his Father died he did not want to be King, but could not face his father to tell him so. He quarrelled with Lord Wigram, his Father”s secretary, because he was ill-tempered and would not settle down to a routine. He did not like work and escaped from it, and delayed and postponed its performance. He was “a problem” and all the ministers and courtiers hoped he would go.

Saturday, Feb 5th
   Bertie Russel has said his year may see the end of the human race. But more likely, I hope, to see the end of Bertie Russel!
    Mendès-France has fallen to a coalition of Catholic right wing and Communists. He was too active for the Assembly, he positively intended to attempt solutions of problems long untackled and get something done. This was fatal. Seven months movement and change was more than they could stand. They refused to let him make a short speech after his defeat but banged and howled for ten minutes
   Favourite stories of Sir Walter Scott:
   When Lady Holland visited friends she took a silver pot. This caused much trouble at the Great Houses. Was it within the province of the chamber maid or the under-butler?
   The Baron of Kincleven was a boatman, who, when Queen Mary stepped on his boat and farted, stepped forward and apologized to the company.
   When the Highlanders captured Carlisle in 1745, a maiden lady shut herself up in her bed room, but when nothing happened after some time she put her head out of the window and enquired from a passer-by, "When is the ravishing going to begin?"
   Scott wrote: I have uniformly observed that when I have no great liking to persons at the beginning, it has usually pleased heaven to decrease it on further acquaintance. Ditto Canon Crosse!

Tuesday, Feb 8th
   A day of events (for us)! An artifice apprentice exam; a ponderous House Committee which succeeded in appointing a possible domestic science woman from three, two impossible; a B.B.C. lesson in which Mary C expressed her belief in a personal devil and evil spirits; and finally an announcement, of which I was  told by a security officer from Harwell checking on a lab-girl assistant, that Mr Malenkoff has "resigned", giving as a reason that he had muddled the agricultural policy! A political soldier, Marshall Bulganin, has succeeded him, but the real power is supposed to be the man who was in charge of agriculture, Kruscheff, so where are you?

Saturday, Feb 12th
   55th birthday. Took Hilary over to Reading and bought him a slate grey subfusc suit for Responsions, which cost £20; felt ruined, but Nora said it was the last suit I should have to buy him - Speriamo!
    The Russians have been preparing their plan for 1956 - 60. In the debates over this two parties have emerged, the standard of living party, pro-consumser, and the party who i) did not believe the consumer industries should be stepped up without more heavy industry, ii)
those who regarded the consumer policy as a threat to the Soviet military potential and iii) wanted a military reply to the rearming of Germany. The first party was defeated when France ratified the London and Paris agreements.
   The Commonwealth P.M.s have stated that the West has overwhelming superiority in nuclear weapons, but there is some evidence that the Communists think they may survive atomic war (or the Molotov  - Kruschev party do) and draw a distinction between the end of civilization and the end of capitalism - capitalism will perish but not communism. Wonder uneasily whether this may be a crossroads in Soviet policy between co-existence or war.

Sunday, Feb 13th
   Debate on Malenkoff continues. Spectator asks if Britain  could survive an atomic war. Some bombers bound to get through. Is the only thing that keeps the Russians quiet that they fear reprisals from American bases? ….. How many bombs would be needed to produce such a radioactive rain that animal and vegetable life would be destroyed everywhere? Is the only thing that keeps the Russians quiet the fear of reprisal from American bases?

Tuesday, Feb 15th
   At nine Canon Crosse rang up. Could he see me, only wanted 10 minutes. He talked for 30 without stopping! He obviously collected any Henley gossip he could find about the school. No Cadet contingent for Remembrance Day, no H.M. for Mayor's Day! Had heard I read secular books in Assembly. Did I? Enquired if he considered Bunyan as such. Finally he reached Jonah and the Whale and Clem tactfully came into my room, so I got rid of him.

Wednesday, Feb 16th
   The old man who made the remark about "heathen" at the Rural District Council thought discretion best and had a cold! Old Denham opened the debate on the minutes and got them amended to make it clear there was no suggestion of ordering the H.M. to do anything. Tom Luker read a letter from the Director of Education to point out the inadvisability of tying the H.M.'s hands and said no resolution was required. After that it was pretty plain sailing. The man from Wargrave, who evidently does not like the Canon, pointed out that as most grammar schools had one period [in religious instruction] a week we were over the mark with 1.4! Mrs de Passa, a church lady, said that the Matrons at London hospitals want a pass in R.I. in G.C.E., which was strange as we'd just sent three girls to London hospitals without one!
   Then the Canon fired! We had the whole thing over again, including the Senior Trustee, Mr Attrill and his rejection by the Ordination Board, the prizes for scripture, what a wonderful man the curate, in fact all the curates, were, and so on. Everyone got more and more bored until shortly afterwards Sir Ronald Davies said, "I move we proceed to the next business", and that, for a bit, I hope, will be that! He really is a spiteful and malicious old boy.    

Saturday, Feb 19th
   Put car in Vincents Reading, at two o'clock. The charge for 24 hours is now 4/-, what a swindle! Our luck was in and we caught a fast Paddington train that was not crowded. Tea at Lower Regents St Lyons cafeteria. Mary had a good view of a very intense Latin courtship, or seduction, carried on quite oblivious of company. Dinner at Marble Halls. Had two mixed grills, but the whole thing came to 14/-, whereas 10 years ago it cost about 7/-.
   Tube to Hammersmith. Anhouihl's play, Time Remembered, was fantastic in subject and decor and had old Margaret Rutherford as the Duchess and Paul Schofield as the her nephew. It was as light and charming as a piece of thistledown on a summer's day. Had to wait on Hammersmith District Line for a train - this was like Russia. A piercing wind and snow covered platforms.

Sunday, Feb 20th
   We went to Euston Square and enquired for the Friend's Meeting House. We were warmly greeted on entrance. Mary had never been to a Quaker meeting and I only to one at Henley. This started badly with two gents from the lunatic fringe, the first read a long passage from some Hindu writings, the second a passage from Isiah and the Gospels. Three other members spoke very shortly and sincerely and the meeting ended at 12 o'clock with a great buzz of conversation.
   On the bus the conductor enquired, "Albert Hall? I can always tell." The Albert Memorial was overtopped with steel scaffolding. Mary wondered if it was worth repairing, but taste may change. We started with Dvorak's Carnival, the Brahms Violin Concerto and Sibelius' No 1 in E minor. The Brahms was of such breathtaking loveliness that I wept.
   We got back to supper at the flat - no heat, temperature only 40°.

Tuesday, Feb 22nd
   The lowest temperature for 12 years was recorded this morning.    
   Mr Barclay and Miss MacEwan from the International Aid to Children came over and gave a talk, one film on the treatment of asthmatic children and one on the Syrian boy with a brain tumour they brought over for an operation in London. They are a small operation, only three of them. The international refugee organisations are like mechanical navvies, they can move people en mass, shovel food, medical supplies by the ton, but they can no more take up the individual case than a mechanical navvie can pick a stone out from the bottom of the trench.
   Thought of Jacquetta Hawkes' remark: The effect (of numbers) on social freedom is yet more evil. Great numbers, unless they are subsistence or famine peasants, demand control. They are in danger, like passengers in an overloaded boat, and must be shepherded, planned for, and always of necessity handled in vast groups with their impersonal and clumsy relationships.  
   
Thursday, Feb 24th
   Another filthy day. Set off with Mary C to conference on What the University Expects of History Teachers at the Oxford Institute. First Professor V. H. Galbraith, the Regius Professor, most amusing. History as a social asset. He had often dined out on Henry VIII. He told the story about a man at the Sea of Galilee who wanted to hire a boat. Boatman wished to charge 3/6. Pointed out he could get one for 1/- at Aberdeen. Boatman replied that this was the Sea of Galilee where Christ walked on the water. At that price I don't blame him, replied the tourist.
   History an adult activity. Boys gain experience from newspapers, radio, journals. Limitations of second hand experience. The individual with an active imagination has the power to make good this lack of experience. Boys and girls with curiosity and an interest in human nature. A sharpening of wits and discipline, the discipline of a classical language or at least a modern one.
   [The Times reported: A second reason often advanced was that history provided a whetstone for sharpening the adolescent mind. (But) as a school discipline history could not compare with mathematics or the classics, and these other subjects could be measured accurately.]
   In the afternoon, the H.M. of Chipping Norton attacked history as an O Level subject, though he continued to do it. I said I had seen the light 25 years ago, but had a very understanding H.M. - as I was the H.M.! At that point it seemed to be snowing hard, so Mary and I packed up and started for home.

Tuesday, March 1st - St David's Day
   The anniversary. Mary wrote: Today we have our combined birthday. The beginning for me of something that I had no idea could be so lovely, such a close and natural contact, full of joy and understanding which intensifies other enjoyments and makes one aware of the beating pulse in nature, flowers, music, art. You see..... how you opened a door for me. I did not know before what it was to have a special place in some one's heart.
    
Wednesday, March 2nd
   A lovely day with plenty of sun and a cold wind. I was over at the flat by 2 o'clock and we got to Aldworth about 3. The downland road from the village was still ice-covered in places. In the hedgerows in some places there were still drifts several feet thick. Soon after we got out of the car we saw some long-tailed tits hopping and bobbing and we were able to get a close view of them. We put up one hare only, but he obliged by standing right up on his hind legs with ears erect. It was too cold to walk to Lowbury so we walked along the track to Compton and cut back across the stubble to the car, where we boiled a kettle and had our first picnic of the year with Lyons' bath buns. To celebrate March 12st, we had a half leg of lamb, red currant jelly, a half bottle of Barsac and some tinned grapes. I gave Mary 15 double snowdrops, 1940 - 55.

Saturday, March 5th
   The Old Boys' Dinner at the Red Lion. Sat next the Mayoress at the high table! The mayor was good for a bottle of Sauterne, but only got a very small half glass and no more. Suffered much from thirst! It dragged on so much last year that the toasts were cut down to two, Association and School, but it was no better. Old Hamilton, the President, just as slow, pointed out that the bar was open to 11.45 and sat smoking cigars. Did not make my speech till after 10 o'clock. Annette [Griggs] was to reply after me to the School, but the poor girl hadn't written her speech and what with the smoke, heat, and an unaccustomed sherry she broke down after the first sentence and collapsed into her seat. Old Hamilton sat stranded like a codfish, but I motioned to Lait, the head boy, to take over, which he did admirably and saved the situation. By this time Annette had missed her bus, so we had to take her home in a mild snow shower. She felt she had let the team down and we had to reassure her.
   I spoke on the advantages of small numbers and the three marks of the Grammar School; the link of learning and godliness (and had a crack at the "heathen" leak in the press), communication (reading and writing), and continuity - the charter etc.
   The clot who is chairman got the head girl's name wrong, called her Rosetta Roberts and read out Rosetta's exam results! When this was pointed out to old Hamilton he managed to get as far as Annette Roberts instead of Griggs. What a set!

Sunday, March 6th
   Took 10 sixth formers to a Beethoven concert at the Albert Hall. It was Sunday and the traffic was light so we did it in 1 hour 15 minutes with a quarter of an hour to spare. It was a fine concert, Leonora 2, Piano Concerto in G and the 5th Symphony. The conductor was a German naturalised American [William Steinberg] and the pianist a young American from Texas [Jacques Abram]. We were in the first circle facing the orchestra and could see all the sections and the individual players as well. It seemed to me a lovely introduction to the power and beauty of the symphony orchestra and the music of Beethoven. I felt moved because I hoped I was opening a door to them which had been opened to me. I said to Annette on the way back, "We have come a long way from Avebury."
   Last weeksent Mary a opy of a poem, On Saying Goodnight, by Alan Rook. It contained some phrases which I liked very much:
“that hard centre of all blessedness
which is the you I love”
“the greatest of all mysteries
lies between you and me”
“No one is perfect, no not one.
I takes a perfect two to make a whole.”

Tuesday, March 8th
    Last week Churchill defended the decision to manufacture the hydrogen bomb. When taunted by Aneuran Bevan for giving up a meeting meeting with the Americans under American pressure, he said he had a stroke which paralysed his left side at the time of the Bermuda conference and that was why he had to abandon the idea of a meeting.
     Bevan quarrelled with Attlee in public, refused to vote for the party motion and is now to be expelled. Labour once more split and election hopes seem fading, but Bevan would split any party!When hospitals were nationalized, voluntary workers discouraged and felt they were not wanted, but now, query conservative govt., things have changed. Attended a meeting yesterday to form a league of hospital friends for the Henley group. Old Charlie Luker in the chair showed his cloven  hoof; Technical girls and Modern School mentioned, but the Grammar School ignored!
       The Burnham Committee now propose extra pay for sixth form work, minimum five periods. Wonder it it applies to H.M.s; if not some staff might soon be earning more than H.M.

Thursday, March 10th
   In afternoon tried to get views of staff on G.C.E., discovered most, but especially Attrills, want to go back to old leaving certificate. Very conservative in their views of examinations.
   In the evening took Nora to see excellent film, Carrington VC. Very quick direction by Antony Asquith, and very good acting by David Niven and Margaret Leighton, so much enjoyed it.

Friday, March 11th
   Sir Richard Acland has resigned his seat because he disapproves of the country's making the H bomb. He is going to fight a by election at Gravesend. By copying the U.S. in its policy of thermo-nuclear deterrents we are, he said, giving up our work of assuaging tension to Sweden, India and Indonesia and others; without us they will not be able to succeed.
   We are in a dilemma; the pacifists would hand us over to an alien, cruel and hateful tyranny; the non-pacifists are ready to chance annihilation of our cities; perhaps there is a way between, a world control organisation, the embryo of a world government. It is true, as the P.M. said, that the history and tradition of Russia make it repugnant to the Soviets to accept any practical system of international inspection. Still he ended his speech "never flinch, never weary, never despair" - We certainly do not need to!

Saturday, March 12th
   Went over to Mary and found she had a bad cold and was complaining of rheumatic pains.

Monday, March 14th
   Mary not at work so hastened over at 5.0 but found her in bed and hardly able to get out. Owing to possible visitors - "Mrs Hewitt, 'er below’, and girl from Library - went over to see Cyril Peach till seven o'clock.
   Returned after supper and got Mary down on floor on cushions and turned on heat from lamp I had brought over. Early in day old Ashton had appeared on landing with News of the World and small bottle of whisky. Between 8 and 9, during application, fortunately there were no visitors. A bit difficult to explain gent sitting reading News of the World while lady lies flat on the floor with pyjama trousers below knees and bottom bare!
   Hilary left after tea for Keble entrance exam. He stays in college till Wednesday.    

Thursday, March 17th
   The Archbishop of Canterbury has now come out in favour of making H bomb in speech in H. of Lords. Was to make it or not to make it more likely to lead to its use? He thought the first.
    Hilary returned from Keble in a disgruntled frame of mind. The dons were aggressive, the papers not the kind he expected, the bed hard and the food indifferent. The result will be known in a week.
   Aneurin Bevan turned out of the parliamentary Labour party, but not by a very large majority. Says he will not make a splinter party (Someone said to Ernie Bevin once that Aneurin Bevan was his own worst enemy. "Not while I'm alive he ain't," replied Bevin!).
 
Sunday, March 27th
   A busy week, no time for entries. Very cheered on Friday at break to find a note from Hilary. Keble have taken him to read P.P.E. in 1957. At that rate he will earn (perhaps) in 1960! Oh this waste of two years military service! Where shall we be by then? Where indeed? Dead or still in Henley! Still, just 40 years later he will go to my old college, a thing I always hoped he would do since he came back in a Moses basket from the Reading nursing home. The fact that he has not been baptized is not now a bar. It was when he was born. The college is the institution above all others for which I feel a marked affection. Dear Hilary, I hope you will not be disappointed. Hilary undemonstrative but secretly very pleased.
   Today Donald [Heath] came to lunch. Tells me he killed a man and there had to be an inquest, however he got off. The latest thing is slowing down people by cold so that they resemble hibernating animals! The brain requires so little oxygen that for a time the heart can stop beating and be operated on. To all appearances they are dead; they have the grey look of a corpse, but can be brought back out of this state back to life. He is fatter than ever. If he continues to put on weight his own heart will soon require attention.

Wednesday, March 30th
   Astonished the natives at assembly by addressing them in Franch. "Et maintenant nous voulons souhaiter bon voyage et bon amusement à M. Clifford et Mlle Jenkins et à tous eux qui partent demain pour la douce France. J'espère que a la fin de la séjour, ils compredront un peu ce que la France a donné à la civilization. J'espère aussi que cette visite ne sera que la premiere de toute une serie." I hope I did Clem's coaching credit.
   Went over to Mary to tea. Found her better but damned difficult.